Sunday, May 10, 2009

Sorry i cant believe in love the way you hoped me too.

My mum is so special so strong.

She came to Australia with no family only friends.
She walked away with only the clothes on her back and her daughter ( my step sister) from a relationship where the man was only into gambling and girls. She walked away from that relationship when the wedding invitations were being printed!

She put up with so much bad mouthing from my dads side because she already had a child. (my dad already had a son as well- double standard thing)
She had me and my little brother with this man, and he left for a young Vietnamese girl when my bro was 2.
She got 30k from the divorce settlement which she has managed to survive on for 8 years. While getting single parent pay and sewing for a few bucks per garment which end up being retailed for hundreds of dollars.

Its only been recently that shes opened up to me about her past because she doesnt want me to repeat her mistakes. With me sleeping over my boyfriend and spending SO MUCH time with him. Shes so scared ill get pregnant without a marriage or even worse become a single mum.

Ive taken it upon myself to pay the rent and go halves on the bills. i'd rather be there financially because i hate getting all emotional. That my brothers job.

I love you mummy.
-Hope you're proud of me.
-Because im looking after you ever since i left highschool whilst still studying.
-Sorry for the pain caused by everyone.
-Sorry your oldest isnt looking after you like you hoped.
-Sorry i cant believe in love the way you hoped me too.
-Hope you're happy and content for now more will come along the way.